Identifying your argument style. The problem with text arguments is tone. We talked in point six about how, if you find yourself arguing or getting annoyed about the same sort of thing over and over again (e.g., how long it takes to text you back, or how they haven’t called in two days), then there is a deeper problem driving the fight. If … It’s not easy to bring your relationship back to equilibrium after a major fight. You could write something like, “I understand you’re dealing with a lot of pain right now, and I am so sorry that I have hurt you. Working out how you and your partner respond to conflict can help you to understand how arguments develop. I love and miss you.” Even if you and your partner have come to an agreement, the arguing can really put a damper on things. What texting is absolutely horrible for, however, is an argument or an in-depth discussion about any kind of serious issue. However, by doing five important things, you not only can improve your ability to resolve conflicts, but can also decrease the emotional injuries as well. Of course, sidestepping an argument is only the first step in sorting through an emotionally charged issue. You may be thinking, "Yeah right--you've never met my mate!" If the argument was recent, allow some time for the psychological wounds to heal. Subtle subversive: tends to avoid confrontation and often hints at problems through silence, nagging or whining.The problem is often the long build-up that develops before an argument breaks out. Difficult to read and easily misinterpreted, tone can allow a reasonable comment to escalate into an ill-judged attack if one party misconstrues it. Sometimes you have to dig beneath the surface so that you can talk about the beliefs and feelings underneath. When you are ready, I hope you would be willing to meet with me to talk about it. Please let me know when you are. Because I'd love to justify that slice and last glass of wine, I asked Heather Kristian Strang, spiritual matchmaker, if having an argument over text could ever be helpful in your relationship. Over 80 percent of those surveyed said they sent more than one text a day to their partner. Reflecting on my experiences taught me some valuable lessons about how to fix friendships. 6. I expect an apology.” (You won’t get an apology during a fight, just a longer fight). Own Your Own Stuff. These may work for you too, if you apply them wholeheartedly: 1. Resolving every argument with your spouse may seem impossible at first thought. Then there’s work to be done in negotiating a compromise or coming to an agreement. Difficult to read and easily misinterpreted, tone can allow a reasonable comment to escalate into an ill-judged attack if one party misconstrues it. Let the dust settle first. Send an email or text message. You shouldn’t do it — here’s why. Let’s take a “No-Fault Do-Over” and try again.” Don’t say: “You can’t treat me this way. Sometimes all you need to avoid an argument is a little time apart to get over feeling angry and get a fresh perspective.